Tuesday August 29

Terrible headache again, the right eyes and were my shunt wire is located.

That's it as Nursing told me repeatedly.

For the rest of my life I will have this pain in my head...

thanks God for allowing this to happen to me.

The actual reality is that  every morning that I woke up it returns to me.

Before I did not give a cents to the religious card at all.

 Right now I will keep not giving much importance to this matter. In fact it is all part of a large superstition.

It is called opium populi for nothing.

Largely people go to church on Sunday because they are caught in a large superstition. They believe that something bad is going to happen were they to skip Sunday church.

Well the reality is that nothing happens at all. This is part of  a large superstition.

I have not gone there for long time and will not get there for ever.

As right now I am feeling that I am done with any time of affiliation or religious attitude.

I am pissed and also very very distant from all the sermon and stories that are telling over there.

Yesterday I woke up with a bad head ache

Nevertheless Yesterday I went to the gym of course.

I had Yoga first and then cycle with Misty.

It was her last day because she is going to be on  maternity leave.

She has a huge belly and I am frankly surprised she was able to ride until yesterday.

Before living I snapped a picture and people at the gym had a smile.

Some of them do not give a dam about it they are superior.

Some of them consider me a daring person.

Everybody over there have never been at CNS nor they have seen what I am seeing here at CNS.

They live in a bubble.

Anyway Misty  place is going to be taken by a  different person. I know who she is going to be.

Anyway no forecast yet..

The same headache  I had today and  the same that I will have tomorrow and the next day and the next day for the rest of my ridiculous life. 

Because my life has turned into a very painful experience.

So god you understand why I am very pissed at you.

So doctors you understand why I have come to the conclusion that you are a ridiculous bunch of people, unable to deliver a decent  service...  

By the way I have let everybody reading this blog, no more closed only to people that only have a gmail but open to any engine to anyway that as a browser and is able to read it ...and  to read the words I am writing. 

Heavy words I understand...so let it be this way.

Screw everything.

This is the results of the pain I am feeling ...

The Enrichement center is a place I am done for a while... there is a bunch of TV and confusion I can not stand .

A place I do not like at all.

There are huge TVs turned for lunch, insufficient bathrooms number.

And then you call it a bloody Clinic dear CNS?

This is not a bad days, it is a bloody nightmare.

It is an absolute  place to be with a lot of demeaning brainless activity.

CNS is proud of it... Well I have my own place to be.

Screw CNS and screw their new Rehabilitation Center.

As I told screw the Homes of Hope I am telling screw CNS .

I can cook and go to the gym . It is hot nowadays but hey there is a limit for everything.... dear CNS.

I am taken to the gym with a patients always and she is not coming to CNS here ...

You have  crossed that thin line in my opinion (BTW I am editing my language to keep it clean)

Who is the person below?

She is my mother Marta.

This picture was taken in Fano where she has been vacationing at the beach.

I had to crop it to her face because of all the prudish attitude  that American people have.

Originally it was a picture of her at the beach wearing a sea side attire a simple that is a swimsuit

Well as a results of the prudish attitude of the American people I cropped it  and framed only her face.

Monday August 28

Already is the medical history for my shunt


Today I had a bad headache and the right temple is hurting. I put together my self and I came here anyway.


Over the weekend.

Last Sunday My shunt really gave me a lot of pain. Sabrina came to check me.

My right eyes bulb was hurting.It felt like something were to wist inside my right upper eyes bulb.


I went to the gym at 1:30pm with Eisha.

I measured my weight last Sunday. It is 179lb at the gym using an analog weigh scale. I crossed reference it with the digital scale I have at my apartment.

It is 178.6 on the digital..

At the gym I chatted with George.


He is Johanna's husband. She use to work at CNS. And she is Stephanie's sister. They both used to be NRS at CNS.

1) Leg curl @4
2) Leg Extension @3
3) Leg press @4
4) Chest press @4
5) Shoulder press @ 4
6) compound row @3
7) seated row @2
8) shoulder press @ 2
9)crunch 30lb
10)rotary torso 30lb
11) lateral rise 35lb


Last Saturday August 26 I did my grocery shopping. Which is fine.

I spent $85.50. It is a good improvement as CNS is giving me $75.

Jamie was always there with her crew of kind people.

I like the place over there.

Based on my experience the people at CNS should train at Trader Joe's to learn about true customer service.

HOWEVER the driver of the van Veronica left me outside in the eat with no AC.

Now as a result my shunt had a fall back.

Of course Veronica is keeping her job and me I have to learn to put up with this service

I just spoke with Vanessa my nurse have a post injury headache. My shunt is a foreign object in my head. I will have recurring headache and feel pain to my head on a regular basis for the rest of my life.

I have received a letter from my mother from Fano.


It contains some old memories

I am the little one on the right

I feel some time it is good to be unaware of what will happen to you.

You see in this picture I already had my AVM planted in my brain.

I have been carrying it with me all this time.

This is my grandparent  and my grandmother family in Fano Pesaro

This is even an older picture. I assume it is from the side of my grandfather's family which I never got to know. In Fano as well

Keep it clean

Sawing my short's bottom that got loose over the weekend

The basil is my apartment is getting really big

I am watering it twice a day given the overwhelming heat.

I made pasta alle zucchine.

I started from dicing the Zucchini very carefully

I made a light soffritto

I cooked the zucchine in a pan

Flavoring with spices

The pasta cooked al dente

I added some feta cheese

I mixed it all together and got an OK meal.

This time I did not like it that much

It is filling up on the cheap.

Thursday August 24

Auch!

My head and my eye.. strong pain in my right eye.

Like the past days I have been disabled by a large pain located in my right eye.

It is a  long running issue for me, the result of my brain injury.

It  gets really bad when I stand. Jolanta understands and she allows me to seat in a chair while my brain is getting better. I read the newspapers and let my blood pressure stabilize.

Over the past days my head was really bad so I stayed back 

Beside I cut my finger in cleaning the apartment. So I was not in a good condition.

Here what it looked like

Here what it looks like today.

Luckily I cut my left hand rather than the right hand.

There is a silver lining on anything.

My family in Italy do not understand this matter.

My brother wrote to me: it  happens when you clean your house.

No comment...let's move on that it is better.

I took care of cleaning the whole apartment, cooking and I went to the gym of course.

Cooking Rissotto allo Zafferrano (Safran) and polpette

As I was staying back I cleaned the apartment

Of course I took care of my own cleaning as always.

The bathrooms carefully cleaned

The living room and the floor over there so much dust in Bakersfield.

Here is the living room after cleaning.

The chairs have been carefully cleaned from the dust.

Today Money management. I am set to get only grocery shopping money.

Only food no other outing of any sort. Being here is already a purgatory like experience.

I am sure I have done a lot of bad things to deserve this treatment.

As always I feel very confident and congruent with these choices of mine no more church in Bakersfield. where the service is rather unreliable and the company... oh well  is what it is.

BTW yesterday at the gym cycle and body pump always with Cassie. 

A good cardio for me.

I came back with Alea and CNS.

Actually the van took a long road as I was driven first with the guys at Cattlerock house.

They have a staff available 24 hours a day.

Rick, Bryan and Mr J. were coming back from a weekend in S. Barbara.

Of course I was driven back by the NRS Alea who first took me to the house...then finally to the CNS apartments on Gosford. I   checked in at 7:36pm 

That simple change of routine had the effect of making my head huring today.

Writing to the boys of course.

Headache... I need to deal with it or CNS is going to deal with it at some point in my life?

Cleaning and more cleaning.. 

It shows I do not like the dust in Bakersfield's hair.

It shows I am taking care of the apartment of CNS.

It shows house keeping is not invited not to do anything over there.

Here is a little bit of an historical growth chart for Facebook.

Rather a phenomenal increase. Just the way you like to see in a businesss

By the way let's talk about Revenue.

It has been pulling in between $7 Billion and $9.3 Billion for the last four quarter.

Obviously the Advertising business accounts for close to 99% of the  revenue

At CNS I do eat my food, I rather gobble down without tasting, standing because there is no place to seat other than next to other patients... so I stand next to a counter.. my choice... I simply do not like CNS at all. 

They are egregiously paid for what they are doing, don not get me wrong.

They have four different clinics in the country, it shows this business is florid and they know how to grow it.

The fact is that the clinic in Bakersfield is overcrowded and clearly under served.

For instance, this clinic has only two bathrooms for everybody.

There is a rush to the bathroom, before lunch and right after lunch to brush the teeth.

These are fancy restroom, as you know, with fancy faucet appliance.

The hand drier that blows hair is integrated with the soap dispenser and the water sink.

Very fancy. I wonder how long it will last for.

I can not take the so called clinic any longer.

Their prosopopea their stupid and brainless activity.

Me I am to read the news paper everyday among the general lack of interest.

Oh the Horoscope is really what gets the guys here going.

Utterly stupid and utterly based on autosuggestion. Obviously you want to read on the newspapers how many starts you have, because based on the surrounding I would say there are no stars in the sky of Bakersfield.

Monday August 21

It has been going better and better.

My shunt is finally stable.

Anyway my body is recovering its functions.

Last Friday August 18 I stayed back to take care of my own life. There is nothing to do here on a Friday other than coming here to get the CNS food. I have rather different tastes for me.. beside all the food that CNS provides is counted down the the last bits... I prefer staying away whenever I feel like.

I took care of my overnight oat for breakfast






I cleaned the whole apartment by myself. Dedra and Sarah came to inspect the apartment.

In the afternoon I went to the gym for an hour of Zumba with Caroline fun fitness and came back by myself.

At the gym on Friday I have Zumba class. A lot of cardio and coordination movement.


The boys had Tennis practice back at home.

Last Saturday   August 19  morning Trader Joe's Shopping after taking care of cleaning the clothes and related tasks for my apartment.

After cleaning  my apparels and clothes  in the apartment I went to Trader Joe's.


Jamie is always there waiting for us to arrive and to shop at the best store in town.

She always has time to stop for a picture with me and to make my experience really worthy.

It was celebrating 50 years of serving the local community

I got many healthy ingredients and a lot of basic food for me to cook.

My three bags full of grocery shopping.

I spent $102.22 and Jamie gave me some special stickers for the boys.

She mentioned this is a limited edition so it is only for the boys.

If you look at the picture above they were celebrating a 50th year anniversary.

For lunch I made a wonderful  trofie pasta with broccoli

I used Coconut Oil for the soffritto and a lot of minced garlic.

A lot of cut garlic

I cooked broccoli in a light broth.

Seasoned it with salt, pepper and red pepper flakes.

I cooked the Trofie pasta on a large pot.

Poured the pasta out and added it back to the broccoli.

I kept a scoop of the Trofie water for cooking. It is rich of flavor and starch.

I added a  lot of grated Parmesan cheese and some raw Olive Oil 

Here is the best view of the pasta

Et voila pasta is ready.

I ate it slowly and by myself without being distracted by the TV. 

This is  the way I like to eat rather than having the TV on like here at CNS.

I do not understand their philosophy. 

Reading the newspaper TV off, lunch time TV on post lunch TV off.

It looks like there is no value at CNS for focusing on what you eat. 

Apparently it is good to get distracted from the food. Have you ever seen a little kids eating.. so much easier by sitting him in front of a TV... the same philosophy that CNS has adopted is molded upon  poor parenting habits.

This is appalling in my view.

Cleaning the apartment by myself again.

I figured out that it is my task to clean while their job to come and check the status of the CNS apartment. Like last Friday Sarah A. and Dedra G. came for an inspection of the premises.

There is so much dust in Kern County, I am constantly cleaning the apartment and yet it still results dirty.

For instance heere check this pad for the floor... now imagine what the air is like in the Kern Valley.

Imagine what is like my own lungs.. imagine how bad this environment is for everybody that has to forced to stay in this place.

Let's talk about eating.

I mentioned they started to turn the TV on.

It is perfectly fine for the American people to eat with the TV on, I mean after all they are famous for frozen TV dinner food and etc.

I imagine it is a effective quieting tool for the patients at CNS.

It is numbing for the most of the patients at CNS

Anyway they like it this way... on the contrary I do not like it at all. 

I was raised  in a different way... I am arguing in a better way.

Anyway on Saturday  afternoon  I signed out and went to Albertson.

I purchased a new can of Lipton Ice tea for $8.99

I also got a sawing kit but Simona mentioned that I do not have any longer those shorts with me.

It is good to mix with my water at the apartment for keeping me hydrated.

I did not forget to go to the movie.

I simply do not  want to go any longer. I will not go with CNS any longer.

I made my choice and that is it.

Last  Sunday August 20 morning I  made a new batch of overnight Oat. 

As you can see I am eating it a lot for my morning breakfast.

Last Sunday August 20  Jerry Lewis died of natural causes.

During my morning I wrote a letter to the boys.

It is about today's eclipses. It will stay with them.

I was ready to go to the gym on time.

I was at the gym at 2pm.

The sup Aisha took me.

At the gym I  had my program to follow.

I was recommended to change it to lighter weight while adding more reps.

So I followed this suggestion  by lowering all the weight. And I took more time in between forceful exercise.

The medical reason is that this approach  avoids increasing the blood pressure in  my body hence my shunt is behaving better.

Adding one more series to my work out routine makes my strength better. 

I set all exercise for four set.

Each set is composed by 20 reps. 

Here is a breakdown of my routine

Lower extremities

Leg curl

Leg extension

Leg press

Upper extremities, shoulders, chest

Chest press

Shoulder press

compound row

seated row

shoulder press

lateral rise

Abdominal 

crunch

rotary torso

At the end I stretched accurately

Greated Ashley at the reception.

After 2 hours of work out I was done. I left the gym at 4pm. I walked back and I signed back in at 4:30p.

It was a hot evening, I walked back carefully.

Once at the apartment I made a second dinner for my day.

I made a brown rice with eggs frittata.

In this case I was focusing on eating carbs and protein as I was hungry after my gym time.

The usual flowers for the day

As always the morning park is a quite place to be for me

Away from the craziness of the rest of the day.