Monday October 31

I was awaken at the sound of swearing by another patient.
He was very inarticulate and repetitive in his swearing...


Obviously you have to be a TBI patient of CNS as otherwise you would never use so many swearing words at once...He sounds like a really bad person...Or you have to loose control of your frontal lobe brain. In addition of loosing control of his legs he might have some real brain damage to handle.

Shall I be concerned at all.

Everyday I am loaded in a van and go to AAC. I read the newspapers for the ones who care. Most of them do not actually  care to listen. It is on them obviously to be in such way. Some of them can  not follow it is beyond and above their heads. Certainly not their fault... certainly not my fault either to be mixed with them.


At 11 am I am always signing off from that suffocating place to come the Homes of Hope in Bakersfield.


In my opinion the AAC, is overcrowded and undeserved. He does not have enough room, nor any therapeutic value. It is a place where somebody should really make sure things get organized in a better way.  Certainly I have been bad in my life to end up in a  place such as  that one. Hard to argue  about  this matter...I feel the guild of having to be associated with it. I feel the stigmata of being condemned to the CNS environment.

Weekend let's see...

I was in La Canada for the weekend
 In the evening we went to eat at Bob's and Raffaella's  place in Beverly Glen in Roscomare.

At dinner in addition to Bob's own family there  was Stefano his wife Jen, and their two sons Dario and Renzo. The usual group of long time friends.

Bob fired the grill 


We all had a good evening dinner

 I had the chance of eating beetroot.

We stayed there quite late as Simona never enjoys an evening out. 

I reminded them that my wife Onomastico was October the 28th.

We all cheered her up.

My weight is 79.7kg or as you like it in lb it is 175.7lb

In the morning on Sunday we went to church at S. Bede in La Canada with the whole family.

The gospel was the one of the tax collector Zachariah.

"We access people based on their look (it is fully true especially here at CNS) 

We have the tendency of passing the judgment on  other people based on their appearance and look"

Easy to mention it in La Canada where everybody is sharply dressed  and has very little economical problem. Very true at CNS were everybody is different and behaves differently as they are not real normal people (me included) Otherwise I would not be here, it goes by itself.

We took the boys to play soccer 

They played well and had fun.

We then went home clean up the boys.

They played piano

Finally we  attended a birthday party.

 It was Amy's daughter birthday.

Her name is Jimin, she  turned 8.

Her mom organized a party in an open space in an indoor mall in Valencia.

Cupcakes for the kids

The birthday girl

 The kids had a lot of  fun, they could really go wild in this place.

Here is Lapo playing Tarzan.

Chicco was jumping and being a kiddo.

Yesterday we saw a lot of rainbows in the sky.

Can you spot the second rainbow next to the big one at the left hand side?

My family leaves in La Canada where my house used to be located.

I have not been leaving there since my brain injury many years ago. 

My family is doing all his best to make my staying at home pleasant.

They are all cooperating doing their bests.

The kids are used to have their own freedom and routine.

This is Lapo the little one. He shows his bookmark...

The fact is that he needs to find soon a book to mark.

Our eldest Chicco is  wearing  is Halloween costume for me.

He is a dressed as a  Taco.

Our youngest is Lapo. He is dressed as a SWAT officer with a lot of nice toys for him

A radio, a knife a pistol and a hand granade, by the way he has a nice uniform too.

As I went to La Canada I lost the opportunity to do the following: first of all to buy food for the week.

Tonight I had to confirm to CNS that I was going to Grocery Shopping.

I need to buy food for 5 days tonight. 

Next  Saturday I am going to Trader Joe's. Today it is Jamie birthday. She is turning 38 years old.

I guess things have worked out in such a way that they are not really  going..

Apparently they were looking into taking me to Trader Joe's.

Tonight the boys decided they want to take a break from Taekwondo.

Simona has agreed with them to do so

Friday October 28 2016

It is a warm and pleasant day in Bakersfield California.

I wake up in a good spirit ready to work. I had a good light breakfast
Cereal, milk, peanut butter and honey with a couple of whole grain bread slices
 with a  yogurt.

Today it is my wife Onomastico (Birth name)

It is Saint Simona. I called home the boys and Simona.

She appreciated my thought. Our boys are not familiar with this recurrence which is typically an Italian one.

Today I did not get any newspaper money at the apartment as the machine had refused to cooperate with me. Brian gave me extra money to feed the machine. It did not work and the extra money got stolen..

I touched based this morning with AAC and then came to Homes of Hope.

Over there today they have movie day.
I stay there for as little as I can or have to.

I chatted with miss  Lisa (Elizabeth) about the reality of the situation in the Philippines. She had been doing missionary work over there.

We talked about the responsibility of the church and its behavior when confronted to the political situation. It is a hard reality when politics mingles with religion practice.

We also did comment a bit about the upcoming political election. We agreed that we are not enthusiast about the current choices. Yet there is a candidate (the blue one) that represents the best choice. The other candidate (Republican) has been running a divisive campaign, he also pushed forward  a very hard agenda to accept.

Then we are both working on our tasks.

My healthy breakfast

Flowers next to the apartment. Can you spot the water droplet? A rarity in Southern California.

This morning my iPhone hanged out for a while. It got stuck in a  loop and it was not responding.

Luckily miss Araceli came in my apartment and showed my how to reset the phone.


It is a soft reset: this is the way it works. Simply press both the home and and power bottom for 10 seconds. It gets a soft reset similar to a restart or reboot.
Whenever it hangs up this is the best way to get it back to work.

To tell the it all, only this morning my phone needed a soft reset, I got scared as I was concerned I could not call my wife Simona.


In my profession there where two different reset procedures associated with the pixel operation.

The hard reset was a full discharge of the photodiode with a total erasing of the accumulated electrical charge.
A soft reset was applied as a way to more gently spill out the accumulated electronic charge.

This was not as an abrupt and decisive operation.

The associated noise charge was quite different as well.

• For a full reset it had a full KT noise associate with it. In fact for a resistance R the thermal noise is 4KTR(DF) where DF is the bandwidth you are considering.
• For a soft reset it is a partial value. It is showed that for soft reset (incomplete reset) this value is reduced by Sqrt(2)

Typically in pixel sensor a soft reset operation follow a hard reset one.

Here is a sensor that I have designed. It was called 3370. IT was a 2M pixel sensor HDTV 

This version is the monochrome version used in high end camcorder and digital video  professional recording cameras. 

You can find the  full datasheet here.

Today I went to the AAC first but I the machine that gives out newspapers did not work at all.

I kept feeding it with coins and it kept keeping the coins without releasing the newspaper.

I got frustrated and felt there should be a better way to distribute newspaper.

I believe in the XXI century there should be a more advanced and better way to provide newspaper to the community..perhaps they should offer the chance of pay with one's phone. 

This is my own opinion of course.. At least they should have distribution machines that are not stealing the money from the people around.

Anyway this morning I went to the AAC also known as the Mnt Vernon clinic

Typically on Friday they watch a movie and they have lunch that is provided to all the patients.

I am always bringing me with me lunch.

I was given a head started last week.  They told me that her at the Homes of Hope  as it was a special event. They  had my lunch with everybody Marina had a baby shower for her baby Alexander.

Here is me holding Alexander. I am clearly out of shape with my parental skills.

This is John holding Alexander.

John appears much at ease with the baby.

He might have some more experience than me.

John mentioned that he is going to be gone the whole next week.

He as distributed role and responsibility to all social workers.

He made sure that everybody was aware of his/her duties and he nominated a person that will cover for him while he is gone.

He clearly mentioned to watch for me as I should not drink his coffee while he is gone.

This is the light lunch that was offered to celebrate Alexander.

Yesterday evening after the clinic I came back to the apartment and compiled the grocery list for next Saturday morning.

I  then spend my time cooking.

 I made again a few meat loafs (polpettone).

I used ground turkey and beef, eggs,  and bread toasted.

In a large pot I mixed all together with seasoning.

 I cooked the veggy ahead of time. I seasoned it and added a bouillon cube to flavor.

The mixing yielded three large loaves that I baked in the oven for 40 minutes.

My mother was with friends having dinner. They were at Lino's house. He his the man with a white bear.

He has been leading a group of ladies to discuss about themselves and their personal life.

Tomorrow she is going to the family grave in S. Gregorio (Italy) for the recurrence of the All the Saints Day.

Enjoy the reading

Giuseppe

Thursday October 27

I had a good day yesterday.
 My morning started with a light and nutritious breakfast.

I then walked in the park had money management completed

I get the newspaper of the day from the kiosk

This morning I went to the AAC, I read the news for the day and at 11am I came here to the Homes of Hope with Alex (transportation person)

I enjoyed very much my activities for my day yesterday.

I cooked for dinner a healthy frittata with a side of  light  vegetables.

The egg frittata was made with Parmesan Cheese and milk.

A side of delicious red tomatoes, basil and cucumber.

Olive Oil and Balsamic Vinegar with a tad of salt to dress. 

Also I added basil leaves from my balcony.

Yes it has been growing for a while.

After dinner I went to the gym by myself

I signed out at 5:25 pm and walked to the gym where I arrived at 5:53 pm.

I had cycle with Cassie and later body pump with Sylvia.

They are both great instructors. Of course at the gym I greeted all the people of the community.

Maria, Michelle, Jim, Lee, Damian

They are working hard with me at the gym

Cycle is based on static cycle with variable resistance. Cassie is telling us what kind of resistance to use and for how long to use it.

 In this way she  can replicate a real experience of riding the street with hills and valleys.

Body pump is based on the use of weight to work on toning different part of our body: legs, arms, chest and back. I am using light weight as I do not want to hurt my body. 

I am there to have fun and to improve  my fitness. So I stay light and focus on precision of movement, repetition and speed.

So far so good.

I am supposed to leave at about 7pm.

I called transportation from CNS.

I had been waiting in the dark outside the gym for a while but nobody showed up.

After a while and after  I saw many people leaving and going back to their homes I thought, why not me? Why do I have to wait on the transportation and its will?

So after a while of being in the dark  I took off and walked back to the apartment by myself.

It takes me 25 minutes to walk from the apartment to the gym  and 35 minutes to walk back in the night after the gym

Of course I know quite well the way back even in the dark.

I paid attention to the rules of the road and to the road  crossing.

I had my fun for the evening.

 In my experience there are drivers that are not very familiar with sharing the road with pedestrian. These are the ones I am paying attention the most. On the contrary others are more experienced  and fluent in maneuvering with the pedestrian traffic. They are the ones who share the road and kindly wait on the pedestrian crossing before taking off.

At the apartment there was the Halloween Carnival.

From what I saw it was all very well organized and the staff worked hard to make the place ready for the feast.

I have to confess that I am feeling  a bit grown up for this kind of events.

Hence I had made a conscious decision of hitting the gym ahead of time.

When at the apartment I signed back in - they accepted me signing back by myself. I was told a supervisor had come to pick me up. But I made it by myself back.

I had my night showers. Also the usual night snack: a shake with Hemp Protein, frozen bananas and milk. A delicious and healthy blend to replenish the body with fluid and with easy to digest protein.

Tomorrow is S. Simone. It is my wife Simona names-day (Onomastico)

This morning when I called home I talked with Chicco our eldest.

I explained him about the Onomastico recurrence.

He said it is fine.  Because they were both born here in US they are not familiar with this recurrence at all.

It is typically an Italian matter .

Regarding our kids here is the situation with their Onomastico.

S. Francesco is celebrated on October the 4th.

S. Jacopo is celebrated on the 13th of April, and the on the 13th of July. 

I also found on the web that it is celebrated on Christmas day (December the 25th) as it is Jacopone di Todi

During lunch I called my mother in Italy on her cell phone.
She was having dinner with a group of friends.
They were eating the desert: cake and strudels.

I heard she was having a good time with her friends. It is a relieve for me knowing she is doing well.

For lunch I had brought an easy one: chicken soup with Basmati brown rice and an apple.

Enough for the level of activity for today.

Tomorrow it is Marina Baby shower. She is coming at Homes of Hope with her little son.

She has been out in maternity leave for a while.

I am glad they are both doing fine.

Enjoy the reading

Wednesday October 26

An open letter to CNS and Jolanta.

Dear CNS and Jolanta, I am following on the arrangement and inappropriate comments  I am subject when in presence of a female patient of yours.

For instance today she called me "You Italian" clearly addressing me with my nationality.

It is an insensitive comment.

She might have aphasia, she might have a debilitating brain injury  granted however she is not excused for her nastiness.She got hinged on my back, relentlessly taking on me  with an obsessive behavior. 

In my mind her insensitive approach is as if I were to address her as "you old person"

 Perhaps I will start to address her as 'you old person'.. as she is clearly part of what we would call a  senior citizen.

This morning walking at the park after returning receipt for money management 

At the time my nose hurts thanks to another patient of yours hitting me  some time ago. 

To be exact on Wednesday October 5. It is exactly 3 weeks to the day.

It is all appreciate of  the care I am receiving here at CNS.

Based on my own assessment there are a lot of shortcomings at the AAC:  too overcrowded, no real room for therapy... you know the whole story..

There is dynavision room supposedly to be used by patients to improve theirs reflex.

It  has been monopolized by Mr John W. with the approval of all CNS as clearly this is not a priority for you all. 

You clinic at Mnt Vernon has little to offer as a real activity place, perhaps you want to keep it low key in that way.

I go there read the newspapers. Of  course when the vending machine decide to open without stealing any  money I manage to have the newspapers. Other day I have to put extra money from mine as the same kiosk vending machine does not function  with high reliability.

Every  day I found a quiet place here at the Homes of Hope 

It is called voluntary placement, well it is a place I am comfortable with and away from the ugliness of the CNS reality. Homes of Hope  is populated by person who function  normally. 

They have not been injured like the patients at CNS.

But let's go to my own journal.

Yesterday evening a normal Tuesday without any Personal Shopping needs.

I had my 5pm Metagenics medication and got a light supper.

Chicken Soup with pesto

I signed out at 5:20 and walked by myself  to the gym. I arrived at 5:48pm.

Right on  time for body pump with Ellie and Zumba with Mike.

I called at the reception to let them know I had arrived and went on with my work out

At the gym I greeted Wayne, he is a nice person. We quickly talked about the election.

It is very interesting to accept  his point of view. He is most definitely a republican supporter.

We always touch base about the status of the country. He has a colorful way of expressing his ideas.

At the gym I greeted a lady I anomaly meet at church with her husband Luis.

She mentioned that Luis  is doing better and better. She looked happy she can share her struggle with another person.

After the gym I came back to the apartment, got my night shower and the usual snack: a shake with Hemp Protein and frozen banana.

I got used to always having a hemp protein shake after my workout at the gym.

Yesterday at  the gym Kyle was  there as well to make sure I was fine. I know I have the status of IOP (Independent Operating Patient) yet CNS checks on me constantly.

As it emerged Kyle  was with a different patient who right after the gym had a  meeting in Bakersfield.

I am simply mentioning that I am operating along different rails.

As always my wife and the boys are off doing their busy life.

She is taking the kids to school and off to Caltech University.

The boys are aware the family is separated and they fully depends on Simona.

I have been and will be out of the picture for a bit longer time.

I have been out of their lives for the past four years,  I will be out of their lives for some more years to come. Acceptance is at the base of the recovery process.  There is no real hurry.

Typically I  call the family at 7am when the boys are awaken.

We talk  about their breakfast and their activity after school.

Yet she has to follow her day with focus on her very demanding  job.

For lunch I brought chicken broth with spaghetti pasta and a Bartlett Pear

I believe it is not  the last chicken soup I have at the apartment.

It is has been full filing a useful purpose. Nutrition light food, home made and really healthy.

Anyway I am always well stocked with food. At the apartment I have a lot of food.

I am always making sure it does not spoil and I make sure to eat what needs to be used first.

Tuesday October 25

 I feel I am a hurry today.

I am sleeping better and a bit longer than usual. I am waking up at 7am rather than at 6am.

Light is coming up slowly during Fall time. 

Hopefully we are going to soon change the time and switch back to regular time.

On November the 6th DST ends. Looking forward to it.

 In the morning I had a quick breakfast

I cleaned all the dishes by hand, cleaned the table and the floor.

  I then quickly walked around the park near the apartment 

The roses near the apartment are always making a great appearance.

I got the newspaper as Amanda gave me the money for it and walked to catch the bus.

Yesterday evening I decided to stay back at the apartment. I  wanted to cook in peace without any hurry.

 I cooked a good chicken broth

I  wrote a letter to my family.

Here is the well proven recipe to make an excelled chicken broth.

I diced an onion,  a few  celery sticks, a few potatoes  and several carrots

I purchased early a diced squash I used for  the soup.

Carrots celery onions and potatoes all lined up so that I do not forgot anything.

Here is the soffritto lightly browning in a pot with Coconut Oil.

                             Of course a bouillon cube was added to the soup

I also carefully added a pinch of Pyramid salt.

At some point I thought that adding  a bay leaf to season was a good idea.

After 40 minutes the broth was ready and the chicken fully cooked.

I carefully removed the bones from the chicken drumsticks.

I added Olive Oil and Parmesan Cheese.

While I was cooking Sierra came to visit me. 

She checked on me, on my meds and on my cooking spree.

She snapped this picture of me with my white apron and left.

I cooked spaghetti on a side in a separate pot.

You see it behind me ( the red pot)

I enjoy very much cooking and cooking healthy.

I love cooking a enjoying a good food. 

Obviously I like very much Antony Bourdain

I like any ideas that can be used for me in making a good meal.

As I do not like cakes I never bake.

I never buy food that is prepared. I enjoy very much getting down to making a healthy meal from scratch.

Obviously this approach is very expensive on my grocery bill.

Simona and any body at CNS knows it very well.

I am very seldom have to throw any food away as I am constantly using the food that has to be used.

I received a charger for the docking station from Simona.

The one I have is working again I am going to keep it so that it can be returned to Amazon.

With Amazon Prime you can returned unopened items and get full credit for the money.

This morning I went to the AAC, read the newspaper and then at 11am signed out and came here at the Homes of Hope in Niles street. Alex drove me here today.

For lunch I brought my chicken soup, in a separate container my pasta spaghetti so that it does not absorb all the broth.

I had a pear as fruit.

Getting too comfortable? 

While eating I called my mom in Italy using Skype.

We talked about the upcoming Halloween celebration at the last day of October. 

It is becoming popular in Italy as well. It is obviously an imported tradition as it does not belong to the local  Italian tradition.

In Italy there is the religious tradition of celebrating at church All the Saints.

In that day people are called to visit the graveyard where their loved ones and relatives are burred.

I remember that our family used to go the graveyard in S. Gregorio di Veronella where all the Rossi family is buried. Over there there is the family burial with the whole relative of my dad.

The day was spent at the graveyard after bringing flowers ( chrysanthemums flower) for the deceased ones of the family.

Here is an example of the beautiful chrysanthemums flower

Well as far as I know everybody is well.

I talked to Simona early this morning.

I synch'ed briefly with her about the boys.

Today their activity is piano and homework,

I will be going to the gym as my food is already cooked.

Enjoy the reading

Sincerely

Giuseppe